I found so much value in this article. Worth your time:

"The Surprisingly Large Cost of Telling Small Lies"

Russ Herrold writes:

That article makes me think about something that has been on my mind lately.

One of my routines for more than a decade has been starting the day at the coffee shop. There is large cohort of people who drop in (and leave without needing to say good-bye) for work or other obligations. Lots of social strata, lots of political viewpoints, and lots of economic situations are represented.

Another Dailyspec member and I have a common friend who frequents that coffee shop. We both were discussing the other day how quickly strangers could pick up on a dissonance between our common friend's words and his true behaviors.

I do not even feel that it is a malicious difference nor perhaps is it under the control of that friend. Certainly he would takes offense if we pointed the dissonance out, and so we have all learned or been trained to avoid confrontation.

Time and again, that common friend would be introduced into a new situation or exposed to new people. Almost at the onset of the introductions, the new counterparties would approach him or me privately during a later debrief or meeting and remark on the 'strange vibe' they got when interacting with that common friend.

I think Polonius' advice in Hamlet and Twain's adages about honesty and lying are relevant here. There is some background detection process running in a thoughtful person that picks up on coinage offered which does not ring true.





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