A Salute to Batman, from Bo Keely

November 28, 2013 |

 The emergency gear I carry dates back to Batman. He wore a 'utility belt' with the basic essentials of crime fighting. I've borrowed the belt in the form of ankle weights. By removing the lead sack from one of the weight baffles, I inserted the items often mentioned in standard survival packs: compass, length of twine, lighter, penknife, pen & sheet of paper. It's saved me more than once.

The episode that keeps returning to mind is when I had to tie up the penis after a bee sting in a tornado, and flinging it over my shoulder like a Continental soldier until the storm abated and I returned to normal size. Bees get angry before tornadoes hit, and this one flew out and stung the base. It sounds funny but it swelled to bursting like the Nutty Professor, until I applied a compression wrap of black electrician tape from my Batman ankle weights. The twine was the finishing touch to elevate it and let gravity do the trick.


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